Temptation Resort- Cancun, Mexico Mondays of Sex Jokes

Here's today's joke!

What's the difference between sin and shame?

It is a sin to put it in, but it's a shame to pull it out.

We till have a lot of special events for the rest of the year, don't miss the opportunity to be part of them, visit Temptation Resort & Spa

Tell us what you think about this little joke.

A Captain in the foreign legion was transferred to a desert outpost. 
On his orientation tour he noticed a very old, seedy looking camel tied out back of the enlisted mens barracks. 
He asked the Sargent leading the tour, "What's the camel for?". 
The Sargent replied "Well sir it's a long way from anywhere, and the men have natural sexual urges, so when they do, uh, we have the camel." 
The captain said "Well if it's good for moral, then I guess it's all right with me." 
After he had been at the fort for about 6 months the captain could not stand it any more so he told his Sargent, "BRING IN THE CAMEL!!!" 
The sarge shrugged his shoulders and led the camel into the captains quarters.
The captain got a foot stool & proceeded to have vigorous sex with the camel. As he stepped, satisfied, down from the stool, and was buttoning his pants he asked the Sargent, "Is that how the enlisted men do it?" 
The Sargent replied, 
"Well sir, they usually just use it to ride into town." 

But the real joke is that you are reading this instead of being at the

OKTOBERFEST party at Temptation Resort & Spa.
You still have the chance with this special promo!

Here's a little question...

Why don't rabbits make noise when they have sex?
They have cotton balls.

Dare to be Tempted and Book Now! get 40 off plus the 4th night free!, 
This promo applies only if traveling from August 1st to December 25th, 2014

Can you guess of what I'm talking about?

Arnold Schwarzenegger has a big one, Michael J. Fox has a small one, Madonna doesn't have one, The Pope has one but doesn't use it, Dominique Strauss-Khan uses his all the time. 
What is it? 
A last name! 
And shame on you for thinking it was something else.

We are running out of rooms for the Oktoberfest at Temptation. 
Don't waste to much time and book now.

Here's today's joke.

Name? 
Abdul Aziz. 
Sex? 
Three to five times a day. 
No, no...I mean male or female? 
Yes, male, female, sometimes camel. 
Holy cow! 
Yes, cow, sheep, animals in general. 
But isn't that hostile? 
Horse style, doggy style, any style! 
Oh dear! 
No, no! Deer run too fast...

Remember, you're welcome to share jokes and funny stories with us.

You don't need to moan to get the best deal for the Oktoberfest
you just have to click here to get 40 off

Here's some humor to start this week.

Why did the snowman smile? 
"Because the snowblower is coming." 

In just a few days we'll be having the wildest party of all the Cancun, don't miss the opportunity of be part of it.
Book here and get 40 Off + 4th Night Free + Round trip shuttle!
if you appreciate the existence of this forum, book through the links provided here as a way to thank the owner and support the existence of it.

Let's have some humor for the start of the week.

A hippie gets onto a bus and sits next to a nun in the front seat. The hippie looks over and asks the nun if she would have sex with him.

The nun, surprised by the question, politely declines and gets off at the next stop. When the bus starts again, the bus driver says to the hippie, "If you want, I can tell you how you can get that nun to have sex with you."

The hippie of course says that he'd love to know, so the bus driver tells him that every Tuesday evening at midnight the nun goes to the cemetery to pray to the lord. "If you went dressed in robes and some glowing powder," says the bus driver, "You could tell her you were God and command her to have sex with you."

The hippie decides to try this out. That Tuesday, he goes to the cemetery and waits for the nun. Right on schedule, the nun shows up. While she's in the middle of praying, the hippie walks out from hiding, in robes and glowing with a mask of god. "I am God, I have heard your prayers and I will answer them but you must have sex with me first," he says.

The nun agrees but asks for anal sex so she might keep her virginity. The hippie agrees to this and quickly sets about having sex with the nun.

After the hippie finishes, he rips off his mask and shouts out, "Ha ha, I'm the hippie! "

The nun replies by whipping off her mask and shouting, "Ha ha, I'm the bus driver!"

We are a few weeks away of the Oktoberfest at Temptation, do you have your reservation?, If not check out our promo
Book now and get the 40 Off+ 4th Night Free + Airport round trip shuttle Included!

No more boring mondays!

“A few months after his parents were divorced, Little Johnny passed by his mom's bedroom and saw her rubbing her body and moaning, 
"I need a man, I need a man!" 
Over the next several months, he saw her doing this often. One day, he came home from school and heard her moaning differently. 
When he peeked into her bedroom, he saw a man on top of her. 
Little Johnny ran into his room, took off his clothes, threw himself on his bed, and started stroking himself, moaning, 
"I need a bike! I need a bike!” 

You don't need to moan to get the best deal for the Oktoberfest
you just have to click here to get 40 off

Ladies, what do you think about this little joke.

Why do women close their eyes during sex?
They can't stand to see a man having a good time.

Come to Temptation Resort & Spa and have a good time with our activities.

Here's an adult joke, to realize today's tension.

A husband comes home to find his wife with her suitcases packed in the living room. 
"Where the hell do you think you're going?" he says. 
"I'm going to Las Vegas. You can earn $400 for a blow job there, and I figured that I might as well earn money for what I do to you free." 
The husband thinks for a moment, goes upstairs, and comes back down, with his suitcase packed as well. 
"Where do you think you going?" the wife asks. 
"I'm coming with you...I want to see how you survive on $800 a year!!!" 

We are running out of rooms for the Oktoberfest at Temptation. 
Don't waste to much time and book now.

Here's the joke of this week, we hope you like it.

A man asks his wife during a 25 marriage anniversary:
- Darling, have you been unfaithful to me?
- Yes, honey, three times.
- When was the first time?
- Do you remember the situation when you went to a bank, but nobody would give you any credit? And finally the CEO of the bank himself signed the credit allowance to you.
- Thanks, darling. And when was the second time?
- Do you remember when you were very ill and nobody would agree to make the surgery for you? And finally the head of the department took care of you?
- Thank you darling, you saved my life. And with whom have you been unfaithful to me for the third time?
- Do you remember when you were a candidate to the position of city mayor and you were missing 36 votes?

Have you been unfaithful? If has been, why and how many times?

Are you ready for the Oktoberfest at Temptation
Click here for booking

What do you think of this one?

A man went over to his girl's place for a little bit of nookie between the
sheets. He presented her with three choices of condom -- gold, silver, or
bronze.

"Silver," she said.

"Why not gold?"

"Because I want you to come second for once!"

You still on time to book with our special promo.
Click here for booking

if you appreciate the existence of this forum, book through the links provided here as a way to thank the owner and support the existence of it.
For more information feel free to call to our toll free number 
1-888-201-7551 ext. 154

Here's some humor to start this week.

Why did the snowman smile? 
"Because the snowblower is coming." 

In just a few days we'll be having the wildest party of all the Cancun, don't miss the opportunity of be part of it.
Book here and get 40 Off + 4th Night Free + Round trip shuttle!

if you appreciate the existence of this forum, book through the links provided here as a way to thank the owner and support the existence of it.

Here's a philosophical thought...

Three people having sex is a threesome.
Two people doing it is called a twosome. 
So why is "handsome" a compliment? 

Check our special promos at Temptation Resort & Spa. 
Stay tuned of our publish and don't miss the opportunity of save some money for you next visit.

Take off that boring face, and smile, you almost come to Temptation to watch the World Cup 2014

The teacher asked Jimmy, 
"Why is your cat at school today Jimmy?" 
Jimmy replied crying, 
"Because I heard my daddy tell my mommy, 'I am going to eat that pussy once Jimmy leaves for school today!'"

Book for the Oktoberfest before August 1st and get

the 4th night free in any room category + complimentary round trip transfer (Airport-Hotel-Airport) + 40 in Room Rate. 

Here's today's joke!

A man walks into a cocktail lounge and approaches an attractive lady sitting by herself and asks "May I buy you a drink?"
"No, thank you", she replies, "alcohol is bad for my legs."
"Oh, sorry to hear that. Do they swell?"
"No, they spread."

Happy monday and we wish you to have a great week.

Here's today's joke.

What did one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob?

"We better get some support before someone thinks we're nuts!"

And the story continues… The annual Stars & Stripes bash gets better every year and 2014 will blow your mind away. 

BOOK NOW

Hi everyone, we want to know your opinion about this little joke.

Q: How do you make your girlfriend scream while having sex? 
A: Call her and tell her. 

Book before July 7th and get the 4th night free in any room category + complimentary round trip transfer (Airport-Hotel-Airport) + 40% in Room Rate. Discover the most tempting side of the Oktoberfest while you join us for this memorable event; 22 days and nights of sensual fun, that will delight your senses and make you think of Temptation in a whole new way.

Here's today's joke.

The elderly Italian man went to his parish priest and asked if the priest would hear his confession. 
"Of course, my son," said the priest. 
"Well, Father, at the beginning of World War Two, a beautiful woman knocked on my door and asked me to hide her from the Germans; I hid her in my attic, and they never found her." "That's a wonderful thing, my son, and nothing that you need to confess," said the priest. 
"It's worse, Father; I was weak, and told her that she had to pay for rent of the attic with her sexual favors," continued the old man. 
"Well, it was a very difficult time, and you took a large risk -you would have suffered terribly at their hands if the Germans had found you hiding her; I know that God, in his wisdom and mercy, will balance the good and the evil, and judge you kindly," said the priest. "Thanks, Father," said the old man. "That's a load off of my mind. Can I ask another question?" "Of course, my son," said the priest. 
The old man asked, "Do I need to tell her that the war is over?".

Book before July 7th and get the 4th night free in any room category + complimentary round trip transfer (Airport-Hotel-Airport) + 40% in Room Rate.

Discover the most tempting side of the Oktoberfest while you join us for this memorable event; 22 days and nights of sensual fun, that will delight your senses and make you think of Temptation in a whole new way.

We all know that Mondays are the worst and the most boring day of the week, It's the day where you have more work, you have a meeting or you are about to do your the check out of our Resort (or maybe, you are already waiting for your flight at Cancun's Airport), that's why we want to help you to take out that awful feeling, and we decided to create this thread.

A husband and wife are trying to set up a new password for their computer. 
The husband puts, "Mypenis," and the wife falls on the ground laughing because on the screen it says, 
"Error. Not long enough."

Also, we want to share with you some great news!
We'll extend our special promo until July 2nd, so, stay tuned and save money!